Sunday Funnies 150726

The Sunday Funnies word of the week is summer:

sum-mer ¹ |ˈsəmər|

noun

the warmest season of the year, in the northern hemisphere from June to August and in the southern hemisphere from December to February : the plant flowers in late summer | a long hot summer | [as adj. ] summer vacation | figurative the golden summer of her life.

• Astronomy the period from the summer solstice to the autumnal equinox.

• ( summers) poetic/literary years, esp. of a person's age : a girl of sixteen or seventeen summers.

verb [ intrans. ]

spend the summer in a particular place : well over 100 birds summered there in 1976.

• [ trans. ] pasture (cattle) for the summer.

DERIVATIVES

summery adjective

ORIGIN Old English sumor, of Germanic origin; related to Dutch zomer, German Sommer, also to Sanskrit samā ‘year.’

1. Un-Bee-Lievable

Ummm...folks...those things you keep calling bees are wasps. They're also known as hornets and yellow jackets. 

Click here for a comparison. Unlike bees, wasps are aggressive and can sting multiple times; so, if you're attacked by a swarm of wasps, jumping into a lake is a reasonable course of action. Just don't call them bees.

Link to Source

2. Summer School (Student Edition)

Link to Source

3. Cool it! 

Link to Source

4. Rain, Rain, Go Away!

Link to Source

5. Natural Wonder

Link to Source

6. The Boy of Summer

Link to Source

7. Summer of Trump - He's hot in the latest polls.

Link to Source

8. diversión del verano en América - fiesta de piñata

pi-ña-ta |pēnˈyätə|

noun

(esp. in Spanish-speaking communities) a brightly decorated figure of an animal, usually made of papier mâché, containing toys and candy, and hung in the air so that blindfolded children, taking turns swinging sticks and bats, can smash the figure and share the scattered contents as part of the celebration of a birthday or Christmas or other festival.

The ongoing GOP nominating process looks very much like a piñata party, but with modifications:

• There is no need to hang the piñatas. Full of hot air, they rise above the crowd on their own.
• Those hoping to get what's inside are brainwashed adults, not blindfolded children.
• In debates choreographed by Fox "News," brickbats, not sticks or baseball bats will break open the piñatas.
• The hollow candidates contain empty rhetoric, platitudes, and well-rotted bullshit, not candy.
• There will be no sharing. It's winner take all.

Link to Source

9. Hot enough for you?

Link to Source

10. Summer Love

Link to Source

11. Summer Games (Jenner-ational Popularity)

Link to Source

12. Back To Nature

Link to Source

13. Back To School Preparation

Link to Source

The Piñata Party

pi-ña-ta |pēnˈyätə|

noun

(esp. in Spanish-speaking communities) a brightly decorated figure of an animal, usually made of papier mâché, containing toys and candy, and hung in the air so that blindfolded children, taking turns swinging sticks and bats, can smash the figure and share the scattered contents as part of the celebration of a birthday or Christmas or other festival.

Link to Source

The ongoing GOP nominating process looks very much like a piñata party, but with modifications:

• There is no need to hang the piñatas. Full of hot air, they rise above the crowd on their own.
• Those hoping to get what's inside are brainwashed adults, not blindfolded children.
• In debates choreographed by Fox "News," brickbats, not sticks or baseball bats will break open the piñatas.
• The hollow candidates contain empty rhetoric, platitudes, and well-rotted bullshit, not candy.
• There will be no sharing. It's winner take all.

Sunday Funnies 150719

The Sunday Funnies phrase of the week is off the wall:

off the wall informal 1 eccentric or unconventional. 2 (of a person) angry : the president was off the wall about the article. 3 (of an accusation) without basis or foundation.

1. Meanwhile in Munchkin Land...

Link to Source

2. Frontier Teacher Certification

Link to Source

3. You Bet Jurassic He's Hungry!

Link to Source

4. Hell of a Final Exam

Link to Source

5. Summit Semantics

Link to Source

6. The Diploma Mill Graduate

Link to Source

7. Rhinoplastic Rhetoric

Link to Source

8. From Life's Do-It-Yourself User's Manual

Link to Source

9. I believe she was hoping for a podia-tryst.

Link to Source

10. The Family Values Cop-out - a behind the scenes look

Link to Source

The Best Way for the GOP to Vilify Hillary

The New York Times reports that the Republicans are spending big money trying to determine the best way to vilify Hillary Clinton. Well, I have a suggestion that could save them and their deep-pocketed supporters both time and tons of money. You will find it in my open letter to Republicans below this first image.

The Best Way to Vilify Hillary Clinton? G.O.P. Spends Heavily to Test It

Hillary Rodham Clinton at a house party in Glen, N.H., on the Fourth of July. Attack ads seek to portray her as untrustworthy. Credit: Ian Thomas Jansen-Lonnquist for The New York Times

Link to Source

* * *

Dear GOP,

Why waste time and money on focus groups trying to find the best way to vilify Hillary Rodham Clinton when all you have to do is show how much she resembles the the many wives of philandering Republicans.

Yes, I know there are also many philandering Democrats whose wives stood by their men, but nothing would discredit Hillary as effectively in the eyes of the general population and also Democrats as planting the notion that she is really a Republican.

Sincerely,

George A. Denino

PS: Aren't these pictures and stories of GOP, Stepford wives a breath of fresh air for those of us who truly love the traditional family values Republican politicians fight to preserve?

* * *

Wendy Vitter, wife of Sen. David Vitter, learned that it is easy to make catty remarks from the sidelines - until your husband gets caught in a sex scandal. When asked in 2000 how she'd react if her husband cheated on her, she invoked Lorena Bobbitt, who famously cut off the penis of her philandering husband who she said also was abusive.

"I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary (Clinton). If he (Vitter) does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me," Wendy Vitter said then. But when her husband stood before the cameras to talk about his name appearing in the records of an escort service, she stood by him.

U.S. Senator David Vitter (R-LA) bows his head, as he makes a statement with his wife Wendy, during a news conference explaining his former involvement with prostitutes...

Link to Source

###Live Caption:Senator Larry Craig, R-Idaho, left, speaks to reporters, with his wife Suzanne, Tuesday afternoon, Aug. 28, 2007, in Boise, Idaho. Under fire from leaders of his own party, Larry Craig, accused of lewd conduct in a men's room, declared Tuesday, "I am not gay"###Caption History:Senator Larry Craig, R-Idaho, left, speaks to reporters, with his wife Suzanne, Tuesday afternoon, Aug. 28, 2007, in Boise, Idaho. Under fire from leaders of his own party, Larry Craig, accused of lewd conduct in a men's room, declared Tuesday, "I am not gay" and said the only thing he did wrong was plead guilty to a criminal charge. (AP Photo/The Idaho Statesman, Joe Jaszewski) ** MANDATORY CREDIT ** Ran on: 08-31-2007 Suzanne Craig stands resolutely by her husband, Sen. Larry Craig, as he denies sexual misbehavior. Ran on: 12-29-2007 Britney Spears' &quo;comeback&quo; gig.###Notes:###Special Instructions:** MANDATORY CREDIT **

Link to Source

"I have learned through the mistakes I have made that there are consequences to sin. I made a mistake. I owed up to the mistake. It was the biggest mistake of my life that I"ll regret for the rest of my life."

Link to Source

Jenny Sanford: Husband removed fidelity clause from marriage vows

Jenny Sanford, wife of South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford, says her husband insisted before their marriage on removing from their wedding vows the clause promising to be faithful.

Link to Source

How can anyone not love the marital bliss, honesty and integrity streaming from the faces of Newt "Family Values" Gingrich and his third Stepford wife, Callista, in this series of stunning images?

Link to Source

Sunday Funnies 150712

The Sunday Funnies phrase of the week is It's all Greek to me:

That's Greek to me or It's (all) Greek to me is an idiom in English, expressing that something is not understandable.

The idiom is typically used with respect to the foreign nature, complexity or imprecision of verbal or written expression or diagram, often containing excessive use of jargon, dialect, mathematics, science, symbols, or diagrams. The metaphor makes reference to Greek (either ancient or modern), as an archetypal foreign form of communication both written and spoken. Technically, the phrase is classified as a dead metaphor, meaning that its components cannot be used separately, unlike for example the dormant metaphor "foot of the hill", which permits saying "that hill has a tree at its foot".

Origins

It may have been a direct translation of a similar phrase in Latin: "Graecum est; non legitur" ("it is Greek, [therefore] it cannot be read"). This phrase was increasingly used by monk scribes in the Middle Ages, as knowledge of the Greek alphabet and language was dwindling among those who were copying manuscripts in monastic libraries.

* * *

Shall we begin?

1. Drachma-tic Irony

:-(      :-)

Link to Source

2. ARS GRATIA ARTIS - Spectaculars have moved from the big screen...

FYI: Although it's Latin and not Greek, the famous MGM maxim “ARS GRATIA ARTIS” is grammatically incorrect. (Click here to learn why.)

Link to Source

3. ...to very small screens.

Say what?

Link to Source

4. This story makes as much sense as the "history" being taught in Texas.

Link to Source

5. Pig Latin

Link to Source

6. Democracy is believed to have originated in Greece;

but, thanks to the Supreme Court's Citizens United decision, it may end in the United States of America.

Link to Source

7. The Greeks Encounter German Engineering

Beware of Germans bearing gifts.

Link to Source

8. Archimedes would say this comic's description of the scientific method doesn't float.

Because it starts with conjecture and through experimentation eliminates all answers that are not supported by repeatable, independently corroborated proof, the scientific method actually simplifies answers to complex questions.

Link to Source

9. Can you identify the language the inclusion of which is purely symbolic?

;-p

Link to Source

10. Much Ado About Nothing

floccinaucinihilipilification |ˌfläksəˌnôsəˌnīˌhiləˌpiləfiˈkā sh ən|nounthe action or habit of estimating something as worthless. (The word is used chiefly as a curiosity.)
ORIGIN mid 18th cent.: from Latin flocci, nauci, nihili, pili (words meaning ‘at little value’ ) + -fication . The Latin elements were listed in a well-known rule of the Latin Grammar used at Eton College, an English public school.

Link to Source

11. Spot the word with a Greek origin in this comic.

Go on! Don't dilly-dally! Get on with it, you dolt!

Link to Source

12. Portuguese Plethora Produces Plurality Problem

Can you feel the sting of grammatical ambiguity? 

Link to Source

13. Remember. It's all GR...

Link to Source

That's all, folks. See you again next Sunday.

The World Hunger Game & The GOP Response

The World Hunger Game

ماذا فهمت من فكرة الفديو هذا ؟
Posted by Ali Hadi Ali on Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Link to Source

The GOP Response

But...but...but...who's in CHARGE...and how is anyone going to make MONEY and amass POWER if people act like this?

Why...why...it's SOCIALISM...and...and...BENGHAZI!

This message brought to you by the Republican Party and FOX "News." Talk to your doctor before swallowing it. Side effects may include constipation and bloating followed by diarrhea of the mouth and the spewing of xenophobic diatribes wrapped in patriotism and the Bible.

Sunday Funnies 150705 - Better Late Than Never

The Sunday Funnies phrase of the week is It's as simple as that...or not.

1. The Simple Truth, but with the following caveat...

For over six years the person in the highest office in the land has been doing the right thing and working very hard at unifying the American people. For his efforts, the jackals on the rabid-right have worked extra hard to re-divide the nation because it's the only way they can get elected.

Link to Source

2. Simply Delicious

Link to Source

3. Work Simply Defined

Link to Source

4. ...Or Not

Link to Source

5. And Jefferson wept.

Link to Source

6. It simply can't get any clearer than that...

Link to Source

7. ...or this.

Link to Source

8. Simple Patriotism

Link to Source

9. Task Simplification

Link to Source

10. Simple Is As Simple Does

Link to Source

11. It's Not Going To Be Simple

Link to Source

12. Simple Arithmetic

Link to Source

13. Knot At All Simple

Link to Source