Sunday Funnies 141130

The Sunday Funnies phrase of the week is Thanksgiving Leftovers:

This week I'm serving leftover turkey although there may be a comment or two tossed in for variety.

1. Ah! So that's how they get in there!

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2. A Maize-ing Versatility

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3. There goes the neighborhood.

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4. Second Helpings?

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5. Three Burned Turkeys - A Thanksgiving Movie

The Theater Ending

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The Director's Alternate Ending

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6. Cows of a Feather Drawn Together

#1

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#2

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7. Proof that today's Republicans are Id-iots.

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Can you say, "It's déjà vu all over again?"

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8. Wattle they think of next?

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9. I'll Volt for That!

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10. Preemptive Strike

#1

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#2

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11. ...and that's why they're called turkeys.

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12. The End of the Leftovers

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Sunday Funnies 141123

The Sunday Funnies word of the week is vive la différence:

vive la dif-fér-ence |ˈvēv(ə) lä ˌdifəˈräns|

exclamation chiefly humorous

an expression of approval of difference, esp. that between the sexes.

ORIGIN from French , literally ‘long live the difference.’

1. Vive la différence? Not if you lean right politically.

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New Oxford American Dictionary:

dif-fer-ent |ˈdif(ə)rənt|

adjective

1 not the same as another or each other; unlike in nature, form, or quality : you can play this game in different ways. | ( different from/than) the car is different from anything else on the market.• informal novel and unusual : try something deliciously different.2 distinct; separate : on two different occasions.

Right-Wing Talking-Point Dictionary:

dif-fer-ent |ˈdif(ə)rənt|

adjective

1 not like us. | He's Black.

2. I beg to differ.

It's not that bureaucracies do things half-fast; rather, it's that those who run bureaucracies tend to undertake vast projects for-vast reasons.

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3. Observable Differences

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4. Anatomical Differences

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5. Behavioral Differences

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6. Generational Difference

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7. Class Differences

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8. No Difference

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9. It Makes A Difference

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10. Healthcare Differences

#1 - Economic

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#2 - Ethical

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#3 - Administrative

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11. Differences in Perspective

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12. What's The Difference?

And so, dear reader, we end with a cartoon, which illustrates a subtle fact. Quite often, the differences we detest and deride in the behavior of others are merely projections of our own prejudices.

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Sunday Funnies 141116

The Sunday Funnies word of the week is hindsight:

hind-sight |ˈhīn(d)ˌsīt|

noun

understanding of a situation or event only after it has happened or developed : with hindsight, I should never have gone.

* * *

Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you.

–Leroy "Satchel" Paige

An Old Joke: A fellow I know swallowed his contact lenses after forgetting that he had placed them in a cup next to the sink. Now he has 20/20 hindsight.

1. In hindsight, this comic should have appeared in last week's documentary collection.

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2. Literal Interpretation Hindsight

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3. Future Hindsight

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4. Plausible Deniability Hindsight

No, how did that get back there?

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5. Historic Hindsight

Later in life, Sherman rediscovered the WABAC machine.

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6. Genetically Modified Hindsight

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7. Delusional Hindsight

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8. Terrific Hindsight (in the original sense of the word)

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9. Grammatical Hindsight

...and tomorrow she'll tell you never to split an infinitive.

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10. Midterm Election Hindsight (or is it foresight?)

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11. Hindsight More Terrific Than That Of Young Stephen King

Stephen King's monsters are fictional creations. President Obama's monsters control both houses of Congress.

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12. Selective Hindsight

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13. Insight!

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Veterans Day (Curmudgeon Edition)

Today is the day Americans honor the brave men and women who have fought and died defending and protecting our liberty.

Today elected officials will profess their support for veterans and merchants will offer them special Veterans Day discounts. Meanwhile, many veterans sit, wounded and waiting, to receive the benefits their government promised them when they signed up to serve.

America's veterans have kept their promise to America; but, thanks to folks like those in the picture below, the elected representatives of our government are able to renege on the promises made to America's veterans.

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The fault, however, does not lie solely with dolts like these, it rests equally upon the shoulders of the millions of Americans who did not even bother to vote last week but who gladly pay lip service to veterans one day a year.

I have come to the conclusion that for a large number of Americans, supporting veterans means nothing beyond wearing a flag pin on one's lapel, sticking a yellow, plastic ribbon made in China on a gas-guzzling SUV, and sending emails to friends and relatives filled with pictures from various armed conflicts bearing the words "Never Forget."

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Am I cynical? Possibly. Am I angry about this? Without a doubt.

Election Postmortem (Lame Duck Edition)

For those who came in late and those who didn't vote, here's a succinct  explanation of how we got to where we find ourselves after last week's midterm election.

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...and when the novelty wears off, those who formerly clamored for character and integrity discard their one-time champion and return hat-in-hand to those who previously bought their votes and are more than willing to do so again with the same litany of snake oil promises and lies about protecting individual freedom.

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Sunday Funnies 141109

The Sunday Funnies word of the week is documentary:

doc-u-men-ta-ry |ˌdäkyəˈmentərē|adjectiveconsisting of official pieces of written, printed, or other matter : his book is based on documentary sources.• (of a movie, a television or radio program, or photography) using pictures or interviews with people involved in real events to provide a factual record or report : he has directed documentary shorts and feature films.noun ( pl. -ries)a movie or a television or radio program that provides a factual record or report.
Disclaimer: Although by definition documentaries deal with facts, the content and commentary in this collection is, in fact, primarily fiction.

1. Entitlement - What's In A Name?

In the world of Frank and Ernest documentaries, there's an opportunity for punning in every title.

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2. The Demise of Blockbuster, A Docudrama In Two Acts

Followup Study: How many VCRs and DVDs of movies you bought and watched once are sitting on your bookshelves gathering dust?

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3. It's About Time #1

Genesis - The Masculine Version

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4. It's About Time #2

Genesis - The Feminine Version

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5. Imperial Rome

Then...

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and Now

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6. Mob Children, Learning The Family Business

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7. The American Electoral System, Just How Id-iotic is it?

For more on this subject, check out yesterday's blog post.

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8. Reformation Redux

Theses one you won't want to miss.

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9. America's Best Interest - A 60 Minutes Investigation

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10. Up the Potomac - ANational Geographic Special

Synopsis: The first African American President of the United States attempts to paddle against the prevailing political current and is stymied by:

• an obstructionist GOP-controlled House of Representatives.

• GOP filibusters in the Senate.

• members of his own party, who undercut his initiatives to protect their assets.

• a selfish and ignorant electorate, which refuses to vote yet expects the President they elected to perform miracles without their support.

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11. SPF, The Case for Global Warming - A Nature Special

After this documentary airs, sales of sunscreen are expected to soar, but the prospect of meaningful legislative action is still shady.

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12. SAT-istics - Examining American Education

Summary: TMI, AWHFY, DILLIGAS? (Click here if you need a refresher course in modern, simplified English.)

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